Off to a good start

The experience of a trip really starts in the days leading up to departure. A whole mindset takes shape, consisting of either fun anticipation or oppressive preparation, or a combination of both. The same mindset is usually shared by all members of the household. If one is leaning too far toward excitement, the other is sure to bring him back to the reality of the UNFINISHED LIST. So we've gotten off to a bad start before. Chaotic last-minute packing, late nights at work, things that absolutely had to get done that obviously would not get done. But here we are at T minus 25 hours and I'm...blogging? It's a very good sign. It helped to have two days at home to get ready. This is definitely the most civilized prelude to an Australia trip we've ever experienced.

So tomorrow is it. I will try to post updates from Down Under if time and technology allow. Wish us luck!

Camping

We went camping which was fine but I don’t really like camping. Greg and I were lying in bed the other night in the glorious weather before it turned into a Baltimore summer yesterday. With the breezes coming in the windows, we were saying how it was kind of like camping. In fact there was a lot more air than we had in our tent. We were saying how we could make a fire in the fireplace and toast marshmallows downstairs. It was funny to admit how uninterested in camping we actually are. I guess every 5-10 years we lose sight of that fact.

But on the positive side, we got to spend time with our dear friends who are very good campers and who saved us from a sleepless night by lending us a fan for our tent.

It was nice to watch Ella sleep early on Sunday morning with the sound of the birds and all the energy they have at dawn. That was beautiful. It was sweet to see her with one arm out to the side and her hair curling around her face with her head damp from sleep. She looked so peaceful.

Another highlight was taking Ella canoeing for the first time. The canoe trails were filled with turtles sitting on logs and Ella liked watching them jump into the water when we passed. She tolerated her life vest and had her own paddle which she used a bit. We only canoed for an hour but if we’d brought snacks we probably could have managed at least two.

Overall it was successful and now we’re good until around 2012.

Hard times for the tooth fairy

It can be hard to find subjects to discuss with a three-year-old. Sometimes I dream up a topic to interrupt the play-by-play that issues constantly from Ella’s sweet self these days. That’s what I was doing this weekend when I thought to tell her about the tooth fairy.

In the past few months since the constant talking began in earnest, I’ve realized that listening takes a lot more energy than talking. That means that each day Ella’s and my energy levels are depleting at different rates and I am operating on a serious deficit by the end of the day. So my new strategy is to stem the tide of talk. This is not easy. Activities do not help. They apparently beg for narration and are potent why-generators. The only three things that work are sleep, singing, and me talking.

So I started explaining about teeth. I started with a good hook – that her teeth would eventually fall out. Her silence was tentative as she decided whether this topic was worth her time, and whether I was kidding. She’d been on a real roll of talking and this story came out of nowhere, so I think she was suspicious. Undaunted, I continued. I explained how the teeth would fall out one by one to make room for bigger teeth like mine. I told her that when a tooth fell out she would put it under her pillow and the tooth fairy would fly into her room at night and replace the tooth with some money. It was going well. She was listening and not talking. She wasn’t even looking like she was going to talk. So I finished the story with some superfluous reflections like that’s that and it’s a great system because you can use the money but what would you do with those teeth, etc. It was a disappointingly short tale, actually. Then she asked with a skeptical look, “Will I see the tooth fairy?” Good, more to tell. I said no, you won’t see her because she sneaks in at night like Santa Claus. More skepticism and she asks, “Where will she land?” Thinking fast, I respond that she’ll land on the pillow. Then Ella smiled in a satisfied way like she’d revealed some truth she knew was there all along. She shook her head, still smiling, and said, “No. You’re joking me.” And immediately went back to the matters at hand.

Fifteen months later

Though this blog has been neglected, life continues happily on Byoona Vista Avenue. Ella turned 3 in April. I had a surreal moment last week visiting friends who just had their baby. They were recovering in the same hospital room Greg and I were in 3 years ago. It’s funny how the universal nature of that experience doesn’t make it any less special. It even makes it more special.

Anyway, Ella’s doing really well. She had to take her first antibiotic this week for a cold turned sinus infection. She made it 3 years without antibiotics which seems pretty good.

Greg and I are managing to get out and do things like normal people do. We never really relinquished our normal selves for parenthood, but it's getting even easier as Ella gets older. I went to Las Vegas and the Grand Canyon with a friend recently. We partied with rock stars at night and hung out at fancy pools in the morning. This weekend we’re seeing a concert in DC. The following weekend we’re camping for the first time with Ella. (Stay tuned because I have a feeling this may be a very serious error. Family camping sounds cozy but the reality is bound to be far from our imaginings. At least we have hale and hearty camping friends who are organizing the trip.)

In other news, we booked our flights to Australia for two weeks in July. My parents are coming with us and it will be their first visit. I’ll do my best to document that adventure, but I may be preoccupied with survival. Ella is looking forward to it but she has no concept of what is involved in getting there, namely 30 hours without a bed for our girl who still spends 14 hours a day sleeping.

Glad to be back on the blog. I’ll post some pictures soon.

Home again

Today marks two full months since we came home. It's great to be back. It took about a month for Greg and me to adjust to normal life; it took Ella about 10 minutes. Leaving Birmingham was hard. "I'll be home for Christmas" playing on the radio on the way to the airport didn't help. I was filled with a mixture of gratitude for what we achieved, fear of the work ahead, and sadness to be leaving Sarah and the wonderful people we'd met. We left Birmingham in a chilly rain and arrived in Baltimore to unseasonably warm weather. That eased the transition a little. Ella traveled well and was sure happy to see our cat Frankie when we got home. Christmas came the next day. All her toys seemed new, even the old ones.

We had a quiet Christmas at home, just the three of us, Frankie, and the enormous stuffed dog, Lucy. Ella brushes Lucy, puts beads around her neck, hugs her, pretends to feed her. She's a good stand-in for Molly who she loved so much in Birmingham.

The holidays were low-key which is just what we needed. Ella tore all the wrapping paper with her left hand. She received some left-hand-only toys which felt natural after all the therapy.

Ella finally saw snow this season a couple of weeks ago. We were visiting Grandma and Grandpa in Pennsylvania while Greg was away on business. It was bitterly cold so we had to enjoy it fast, but we did. Ella tasted the snow and got wheelbarrow rides from Grandpa up and down the street. She held an icicle. It's the most wonderful thing, seeing someone have all these experiences for the first time. She got a lot of exercise walking through the snow and we all slept well that night.

Ella has changed so much in the past few months. She's had her first haircut, she is saying "please" and "thank you." When I told her something was broken recently she suggested we "buy new one." She never forgets who gave her a gift, even if it came in the mail. She spins around and makes herself dizzy. She plays "flower shop" and can identify the 15 varieties of silk flowers we have. She absolutely loves food -- real and pretend. Grandma and Grandpa bought her a grocery cart which was an enormous hit. It's great to see her pushing it with two hands without being reminded. But it's most fun to see her "shopping" and stuffing that crazy doll into the cart.

Ella sits on the sink to brush her teeth before her bath every night. Here she's showing off for Grandpa using two hands. She's eating all her meals with her left hand for now without much objection. She takes caps off pens and Chapstick using both hands. She's discovered she can do so many things that wouldn't have been possible without all the hard work in Birmingham.

Finally, I wanted to post this photo taken recently at Cylburn Arboretum near our house. The first photo on the blog was taken at Cylburn so it seems appropriate. I think it speaks for itself.

Thank you to our family, friends, therapists, neighbors, colleagues -- everyone who has supported us during the past year. You've made the hard days easier and the joys all the more exciting to share.

Fond farewell to Sarah

Yesterday was the last day of therapy in the program here. It was a day to celebrate, and that we did. It was also a bittersweet day because we had to say goodbye to Sarah, who has worked so expertly and diligiently with Ella for the past month. We've gotten to be real friends with Sarah and we're sure going to miss her. We've weathered some storms together and we've had many victories. As I'm writing this, Ella just came up and planted a big kiss on Sarah's picture. We bade her a fond farewell yesterday, and we will never forget the wonderful gift she gave us with her professional expertise and her big heart. To cheer us up, we think of the next lucky child who will get to know Sarah and whose life will be changed by her great skill.

Daddy's back!

Thursday morning might as well have been Christmas. I've never seen Ella so happy and beside herself as when Greg walked in the front door. She didn't hesitate for a moment with big hugs and lots of kisses. She looked back and forth from Greg to his picture a few times with a big smile. They're inseparable now. She says "Daddy," then looks at me and says "Mommy", and then she says "both." We both missed Greg so much, and it's been a wonderful reunion for the three of us.

Pet therapy

We had a visit from Labrador retriever Molly this week and her great handler, Lisa. Molly is trained to offer pet therapy, which as far as I can tell means letting little kids do anything they please without getting annoyed.














Ella covered Molly's head with a towel to play peek-a-boo, piled toys on top of Molly, and put Mardis Gras beads around her neck, all with her left hand. She also fed Molly treats, took her for a walk around the apartment, and brushed her, so I guess there was something in it for Molly. Molly came to us through a non-profit group called Hand-in-Paw. She and Lisa were real professionals and a major bright spot in our program here.

Thanks to Lisa and Molly for a very fun morning!

Studio portraits

Here are some of the studio portraits we had taken this week. It's the first time we've gone to a cheapy portrait studio and now we're hooked. Ella loved sitting on the padded table which she decided was a "bed."

Pet Shop Girls

Every Thursday after Ella's nap we visit the local pet shop, Wags to Riches. The staff there has been so sweet to us. They've gotten to know Ella and let her play with everything in the store, including the kittens, puppies, rabbits, and pot belly pigs. It's been a fun weekly ritual, and we'll miss our visits with them!

Portrait

There isn't a lot of news to report, but I wanted to share this photo of Ella. We're planning to have a little portrait made tomorrow and we staged this to see if we liked the outfit. She hasn't worn tights since her first birthday and she was pretty excited to try them. I like the photo because it really looks like her, it's honest. She looks older than I think of her. Her left hand is in a bit of a fist which is still a tendency even though she has a good range of motion. It shows her little face not smiling or performing, just happy.

Therapy was a bit of a challenge today. It's a big change after the last three weeks, and we're all adjusting.

Greg is flying down on Thursday morning, only a day and a half away. We can't wait to see him and be home in time for Christmas Eve.